music+passion=love

I look to find the sunset 

as I lie gently in your arms

forever hasn't been spoken

but we both secretly hope it will.

praying out of desperation,

I long to know the feeling again.

distance and seperation 

are much harder to push away.

the mind is such a fragile place,

for all my thoughts, my hidden secrets,

how much longer can I keep them.

soft spoken and quiet,

I'm no longer who I used to be.

after all th...

swallow, shallow

oh sweet summer sky.

melting in the dissaray 

of a broken starless night.

my heart, beating to catch up,

to the pace of your racing soul.

I can feel you, although I can 

no longer feel emotion,

I can feel love somehow.

longing to shed my skin,

let tears fall, and allow 

myself to see this shadow 

that follows. 

skeletons from my closet,

come creeping out, one by one,

thoughts overflow from my soul

my brain warning overload

but at the same time

I remain happy.

feeling such a peace when I'm with you

death, time, and guilt are erased

they seem to dissipate in your presence

how? why me?

does anyone else feel

as deeply as I do?

can anyone hear what

parts from my lips to the world?

someone must know this feeling

someone is willing to share

where are you?

are you out ther...

Momma

We met not too long ago

And with the time we’ve known each other

I felt I have bonded well with you

For as long as we’ve spend time together.

Although time will tell all,

I pray we grow closer,

For you have taken me in

And treated me like a daughter.

I am so grateful for you and your son,

Thankful I have been given the chance

To love you both.

Thank you for your kindness

For such a sweet and loving...

I haven't written in quite some time

my soul hasn't felt the rays of the sun.

darkness crept in, filling within,

seeping through the daylight, 

trying to steal my sunlight.

keeping me from believing

there's so much more to life

than just moving along

my story will not stop

my life refuses to stay still 

as the world still turns 

my head spins 

my heart still beats

and here I am

again and ag...

cast all fears inside

I have gathered all thoughts

gotten them ready to burn

sketch the pattern of my memories

they all seem to have a specific 

repeating design

who am I?

emptiness filled me no more

and so I am still broken

lacking everything I need

you can't fix me

you cannot create 

what is so torn, so messed up,

emotions are running wild

carrying their guilt into the night

hoping for just a...

wow! I feel so dumb and ignorant sometimes. haha. after a crazy day of letting some sadness and anger out, I came home. I started watching "Facing the Giants" with my dad and tha part where the coach blinfolds one of his football players caught my attention. The coach was trying to tell the team they were going to beat one of the hardest teams in the region. Brock doesn't believe they can beat the team they are going to play against so the coach has him and another teammate get up to do the D...

silence. silence speaks volumes and we do not even realize it until we become silent and listen. with all the chaos of hopes, dreams, families, love, desire, school, work, activities, and everything else life throw in, we become lost in a huge array of noise and we lose complete focus on the most important things. with all this noise, how are we supposed to hear the voice of God? how can we know he is working? how can be sure we are doing his will, doing what his heart longs for us to do? we ...

this entire week has been something else for me.. for a short moment, I started slipping back into a trance, a trip to a very chronic case of depression...the other day my mother finally said.. "snap out of it Kristi! this is not good for you.." she went on to say I needed to figure something out to get out of this trance I was slipping into rather quickly.. little did I know, this was only the beginning of a beautiful awakening!! I left my house and went to clear my head. I caught up with an...

I look in the mirror

seeing too many choices

hearing too many voices of reason

logic is no longer the challenge of the game

something longing deep down

to numb itself 

from feeling

from knowing

from seeing 

everything before her

to lay aside all thoughts wrestling in the mind

fighting to decide

struggling to breathe

harder, harder

drowning

further